Tidal Waves - A Series of Lovepoems

Your Aura is so thick
it is palpable.
majestic

I can see it behind walls

behind doors

around corners

gleaming, rocking.

Why do you run

oh darling

Why do you hide

Is it pride that's captured you?

Ensnared you in its clutches

wrapped around you like a cage.

Thick, cold metal binding your

beautiful beautiful light.

Wow--if only you could see what I see.

You were made of light.

Birthed in it 

like a golden stream of honey.

Your aura is thick with it. Rich.

Dear, dear creature

Why do you wander

Where do you go

Seeking, Searching

Fighting, Fleeing

The Earth mourns for you

it heaves and sighs

and I with it.

Tears like monsoons fill oceans

where waves crash over us.

How many more 

moons will you take

Dear one

How many more seasons

Flying away

Flying through you is

the divine spirit

and yours with it

Do not seek darkness

which calls to you

from the familiar depths

of your womb

your power-chakra

It's cry

and howl

pierce your mind

your throat closes up.

Its clutches bind you

Your third eye weeps 

for the beauty

it can not see.

This darkness

like an old friend

bows to you.

It fills your empty places

with its two-faced words

and empty promises of bliss.

It keeps you company

in your silent moments

playing on weaknesses

like a game of competition.

and wedging into cracks once opened

ever-prying and

turning its back to you

when you least expect it.

Then forever knocking

on a door you swear always shut.

You know. You shut it.

Don't listen to its whistling

its humming

its breath on the wind

It is always searching

for another way in.

Saying Hello,

to reacquaint itself 

with your familiar mind

and heart.

To tell you the easy way out

the one you want to hear

that you always want to hear

long for.

The sounds of a siren.

Don't give in

Fight

You have to fight.

You must fight.

Your precious heart deserves better

More.

You deserve peace.

You are worthy of love

You are worthy of joy.

Believe

Please Believe.

~

True Love is longingly waiting for you

To embrace it with open arms

with grace

with humility

For you to let your tears finally flow

To settle your aching heart

and to let your chest heave

and release your inner truth

with a final sigh.

This is not just a dream

or a fairytale

I see, dear one. I know.

But my words

are nothing to you

but a passing songbird finding food.

Your words

are the only words

that have power over you.

Your thoughts

and the words of your inner world

all hold the key

to unlocking any door

of your heart

and of your life.

~

I love but I cannot give.

For you reach to me

with claws like the siren

that chains you to your old ways.

If I bowed

we would both fall 

and drown.

Oh love

Oh love.

You must always know

and always hear

the sound of the light

The truth waiting at the door

for you to simply let it in.

Humility and courage

are all that are needed

to free you from yourself

and your tired aching heart.

Love is here.

Love is waiting

and with it

truth follows

freedom

like snowmelt 

to the oceans.

~

Where you go, I cannot swim.

Oh friend, who's made from golden honey.

My soul weeps for yours,

for the battles it carries

like shards of glass

within its depths.

Your smell still lingers on me

but I daren't recall your love

I long to embrace you eternally

although knowing I would fall.

My gut wretches when

I think of your grip on me.

I am strong

but your game drowns me.

Large ocean waves crush me

whenever I stand in your presence

still longing for peace within you

to form connection between us

the intimacy everyone yearns for

Woe is me

A light in the darkness

that can not shine while

you remove my oxygen.

If only I could open

your heart to breathe

the fresh air

that we both crave.

Together.

I dare not waver.

I must preserve my light.

~

Rosem Sprig

Thank you.

A quote I must share. over and over. It's what I need to here.

  “Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, 'Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?' Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”

― Marianne Williamson, A Return to Love: Reflections on the Principles of "A Course in Miracles"

Consumerist culture is killing the planet.

I wasn't going to say it, but since maybe I haven't yet, let me write. It's one of the most obvious and easy ways to use your dollar-power to either decrease or increase problems on Earth. 

What are you buying?

Our US Capitalism is all about selling more to make more money to sell more to make more money to grow to make more money to sell more to grow more and on and on. 

But most of the things we purchase in our lives either aren’t necessary, or are items that should last decades, most-or all of our lives.

If we are healthy, even our clothing should last most of our lives. We shouldn’t be buying new clothing every year. It takes a LOT of resources to produce clothing. I mention clothing first because as a female, I am targeted with clothing ads everywhere I go. Every day.

Our household items should last a long time. They should be lasting decades.


1. As an artist, this can be a dilemma. I love practical things, but I also love self-expression. So the dilemma one has living in a rich and privileged society is this; how do I express myself, my full and ever-changing-self without discarding and purchasing new things multiple times a year. Especially, when those new-things should be things that are lasting us many years to decades or even our full-lives.

2. We should be thinking about how to take care of the things we have so that they do continue to last.

3. Food. Waste. If we learned how to cook, we would reduce a lot of waste in our kitchens due to the purchasing of not-just pre-made packaging, but also letting things spoil because we forgot we bought them and we didn't know how to cook them so the idea of trying was daunting. (this was definitely me and sometimes still is!) Most of the trash we throw out every week comes from our kitchen or our hygiene practices. Since there are many low-waste swaps one can make in hygiene that have become increasingly popular and common over the years, the kitchen is the second thing to turn to when we try to reduce waste in our lives.

But the reason I posted this is because we, I included, are bombarded with ads telling us to “buy fall____”, “buy Christmas____”, buy your winter, spring, summer, thanksgiving, Easter, Christmas, Graduation etc etc etc etc __________ here and now!” “Sale. Sale. Sale.” Every day, of Every week, of Every year, here in the states. 

But the truth is that following this advertising, letting it guide is, is contributing to our depression, our loneliness, our isolation, our grief, and the destruction of the planet we call home.

 

As an artist who values reducing waste and impact on the planet, and as someone who also values self-expression in every aspect of their lives, thrift stores are an extremely important if not totally essential part of my life. If I have too many things, I should be able to donate it somewhere. If something of mine breaks or I need a new one for some reason, I should be able to get something somewhere without adding to the problem. Thrifting is a beautiful asset and resource to our communities and I highly recommend you consider using one next time you need to shop or reduce your household item quantity. If we don't use these resources, they may eventually disappear and that is not something I think we can risk allowing to happen.

~Later~

Rosem

The Metaphysical World of Darkness

Trigger Warning: Metaphysical Boundaries. Talk about Spirits and Darkness, and Mental Illness.


God gave me the gift of sensitivity

But I have had ghosts talk to me on multiple occasions now. 

No, I don't want to elaborate. No, I don't want to be a medium. Yes, I am informed about metal illness. Yes, I have good doctors I am open and frank with. Yes, it could have been because I was messing with my migraine medications. 💁 I'm fine no matter what "it actually was", but I do believe my gut's voice is truthful. I take it as what it was that I felt and experienced, and resolved to not be bothered so much by why or where it came from in this case.

But I believe that there is a fine line somewhere that determines the difference between hallucination and spiritual/metaphysical encounter. 

I talked to my counselor and he was surprisingly validating.

My friend had a "dark presence/entity" that they had invited in out of curiosity in their past, and it drained them, threatened, scared and manipulated them. And it used her family and friends to talk to them.
I believe that I heard it when I was on the phone with them, trying to get my attention and talk in the same way ghosts had previously.

Ever since then, I have had a lot of really serious talks with them and reached out to spiritual leaders and another friend who also has the same sensitivity that we do.

I have set important boundaries with them and was frank with them about the severity of their situation. I have learned a lot about "demons"/dark entities because of this, and how they prey on people. Humans have their own power source inside of them but if we are naive or careless, we can give our power away to these spiritual entities, and if we choose to do that, they can possess us or use people we love to manipulate and threaten. They really only have power that we give them, whether we unknowingly or carelessly give it, or we intentionally give it. I do believe the "7 sins" are points in our souls that they use to wedge their ways in. If we are careless about our weaknesses, we are going to be less likely to guard them and more vulnerable to manipulation from darkness; whether its just negative thoughts, and feelings or something more. 

When I set important boundaries and surround myself with light, I am not worried, because through this last recent journey, God has also shown me a lot of grace and truth in his power when I say the Jesus prayer especially and when I call upon saints. I can feel now when a demon is nearby sometimes and it could be scary, but if I remember my power and the power Christ offers me through simple intercession, they become nothing more than a distraction. A trouble-maker only if I let them be trouble. When I pray and call upon my inner power source that God gave me and call upon Jesus Christ, they go away. They don't have any power that we don't give them, either with our thought patterns or our choices.

This is important to remember. Fear is their strongest weapon against us.

And this is also all why counseling teaches so many good important beautiful things. Because boundaries and mindfulness are the keys to protecting ourselves and each other. They are the keys to unlocking loving light in all our relationships.

Evil can't rule us or others if we chose to rid ourselves of it. God protects us all with the gift of free-will. No prayer & no force can harm us spiritually, mentally, physically, or metaphysically unless we give it permission to.

It is a constant struggle, but for most people, it is just normal life struggles. Wanting to hold onto our pain and use it to "get back" or "get what we deserve" as an example. I think we all have low levels of dark fluid energy inside of us that moves through our thoughts, and minds. But we chose whether we give them power or not by choosing what to think or do or say. Honoring that we witness them move by is important but we are not the same as those thoughts, or any of our thoughts. We are separate. That is an important thing to recognize because if we think we are our thoughts, the devil plays on that and uses it against us; causing things like depression and eventually suicidal thoughts.

But people can allow dark fluid energy to attain form and being and those beings are much more dangerous and powerful. You could call them "Devils", or darkness in a more solid-state. But, even talking about them in specificity feeds them because the act of personifying them gives them more form. In a sense you could say they prey off of our curiosity, naivety and any little flaw we have. Any little darkness. Our thoughts have power. They have power that we give to them.

This is why it is so important for us to strengthen ourselves from within through prayer and mindfulness; meditation and in our lives by surrounding ourselves with things of light and goodness. Both physical/material, emotional and spiritual.

Even horror movies when depicting certain realistic things or dark things; especially when just for the sake of being dark but not for the sake of healing or teaching, can absolutely weaken our protection and strengthen our darkness or even invite the devil into our lives and hearts.
Everything we expose ourselves to can influence us if we let it. Every single thing we expose ourselves to is something that we have been exposed to. It is now in our minds from that moment forward.

But please take this seriously. It is very important. --This is from a place of care and concern as I first wrote this for loved ones in my inner circle. 

Most humans take it all for granted and naivety easily can people swept into bad situations. It is all very real. I have heard them speak and felt them linger.

And certain people are more susceptible to the harm.

God does use ignorance as a protection for many. Because if they don’t notice what they are exposed to but are instead very strong in themselves, it can be their power and protection because not everyone is very sensitive and susceptible to this energy like my two friends and I are, and those people are safer than us. They are less likely to dwell on the concepts of darkness or light, and less likely for curiosity to draw them into a place where they are in over their heads.

Spirits know who they have a chance with; and they will quickly move along to a new target if they find that you are either too hard to crack or don’t have enough open doors. Especially dark spirits. They don't have patience. They just want to cause chaos as quickly and easily as they can. And they know that if you have Christ on your side and in your heart, that they don't have any real power anymore. They will cease to exist. They will shrivel up and die. It's like removing their oxygen with fire. It is science. A science of the metaphysical. So, when you call upon Jesus Christ, they will flee. And I have witnessed this firsthand.

These doors can be either through our sins, or through our large quantity of negative exposure or through your curiosity about learning or communicating with the spirit world without any guides or tools to protect you.

Hypersensitivity combined with Trauma can lead to schizophrenia. If you don't know anything about schizophrenia, let me tell you everything you need to know. It will ruin your life and you don't want it. 

Doing hallucinogenics or psychedelics can also lead to hypersensitivity, especially potent ones or ones in large quantity.

I believe they can cause so much of a sensory overload that it mixes the metaphysical world neurologically with your own thoughts, feelings and creativity and that's where delusions can come from and where mental illness begins. These drugs can open up your sensitivity and for many who are not already sensitive, that can be very healing because the truth is much more beautiful that most realize.

The truth is also more challenging and difficult than most realize. Which I am sure is why so many people flee from it. Not everyone can face the truth alone. But even if you believe you are a strong one, don't get cocky. Just as God's love is bigger than human comprehension, so is the Devil's darkness heavier than human's ability to handle. And I believe this is where delusional mental illness and/or demonic possession can and do come into play. You don't want it. Run away from it. It is not meant for you.

Trauma can trigger this sensitivity to work against you.

I believe that if you heal your trauma and learn to love and nourish yourself, your psychotic conditions if you have them can lose some of its power over you. This is what I believe I have witnessed and would like to believe. There is always hope and always room to heal. 


For Christians who say: “But only God is my protection!”

I say; “Yes and God gave us all part of the Holy spirit on Pentacost! So God is always with us with a sword and shield whenever we need to call upon Him. He is waiting in our hearts. So shut up and look inward. A lack of self-believe, self-esteem and self-value is from the devil. It's a dark thought planted to turn you away from the beauty and peace you are designed to commune with.”

I am so sad for all the lost souls. The devil preys on the weak!!!

I am so privileged and lucky. There are parts of the world where the lost have forgotten their names and they are so comfortable with the darkness that they let it in at first sight, and they even turn away from the light because they truly believe they are no longer worthy of it; they have forgotten that they were born of it. It becomes foreign and unfamiliar to them.
I think that is what demonic possession is.

And there are parts of the internet where the weak and untrained are drawn more easily into darkness. Porn is a big one for example.


What else can weaken you? Physical weakness for sure. Sickness or drugs. Alcohol weakens you. Being tired, or emotional, or going through a hard time without the emotional support and physical support that you need and deserve all weaken you. I'm not just talking about dark spirits possessing. It all starts somewhere. I don't believe everyone is going to be attacked by a bad spirit. But weakness makes us more susceptible to temptation, sin or even if you are too weak to be present in your own body (aka dissociation); that is a thing as well that can be easily infiltrated.

Fasting is a big unique because if it's out of neglect, it will weaken you. But if it is out of self-sacrifice ritual and combined with prayer, it can strengthen you.

But here is the hope, guys. The light in the darkness is this: We are all capable of healing. If we look inward and pray and allow others with more experience, perspective, insight, wisdom to examine what is really going on in our hearts and minds and bodies (counselors/psychologists) and to enlighten us with their perspective and their insight, we can all heal. I personally think every human in the world deserves a good counselor. But if we humble ourselves, and are wise about the source, anyone could be able to help heal us with their insight. 

We are all children. Little children, who have been wounded in one way or another. Our earthly caregivers have failed. Our earthly connections and relationships are flawed, and we know that we need it to be different. So, we get stuck in circles because we look outward for that healing. "If they can't give it to me then I will find it somewhere else." "Maybe this will, or that will, or he will or she will or they will give it to me. I crave it, I need it."

And the way to heal is this... Speak to yourself. Allow different parts of yourself from different times of your life to speak freely, at the same time, from their different places. And notice who is wise and grounded, and who is reacting out of fear or preservation. Let the wise sage in your heart speak. Let them nourish the broken parts of you. Give yourself permission to love yourself, even in your darkest moments. Self-Talk is powerful. Just as I was saying above in another way. Our thoughts have great great power, and it is through them that we find healing as well. 

It takes practice. You will find parts of yourself are untrusting and resistant to your love. "You don't have the authority to tell me I am okay. You did ____,___,____ to me and I was hurt. And then you did it again." The inner critic that they are is just trying to protect you. But you must persevere. You must praise your accomplishments on all levels. And you must rein in your anxious critic when they aren't seeing the picture as it truly logically is in the present moment. 

Eventually, if you do those things, you will be healed. You are capable of healing. God gave you the ability to heal yourself. Use it. You must be accountable for yourself, and use it. 

With love and Hope,

Rosem

Christianity in the States

 This country (world) is messed up. I like my progressive bubble. Where 'feminism' isn't a trigger word and just means giving women the same respect, and rights that men get. Where progressive *IS* the future because (news flash) this country doesn't listen to scientists, it listens to money and money-loving rich. This country is built off of manipulation of the masses and nothing less. There is a reason Europeans are so much happier and well adjusted, and the young people from there are more mature than young people are here. (okay okay---she's a biased one with not *that* much life experience)

I keep learning about more and more celebrity figures, and american cultures that are shocking to me. People are so stuck in their ways that they make up problems that don't exist just so they can avoid the ones that do! Ignorance might be the worst problem in the world. I will say it again and again and again until I die. "The Truth will set you free." The truth will set you free. Breathe in the truth. Suck it up. Cry it out. Feel your emotions. Do whatever you have to do, but for God's sake, the sake of your own soul and the wellbeing of every other living being on the planet, face the freaking truth and educate yourselves. And grow, and learn, and be uncomfortable, and never stop because that's the only right path. (I don't mean putting yourself in dangerous places or uncomfortable ones 24/7. God had a day of rest for a reason)

I wish I could just help everyone stop sabotaging themselves and each other, but I can't. This is all I can do. Talk and hope people listen. Write and hope people read, and be in people's lives as a ear as much as God allows me to. Exposure to different ideas from the comfortable ones you were raised in is essential to become well-adjusted, stable, healthy, mature, and loving. If you are a Christian and your goal is to be loving, you need to get out and hang out with people who aren't. Jesus was before Christianity. I have no idea how so many Christians can just go to church and call it good. It's like they read the bible and obtain none of its information. If you are doing anything out of fear, you need to take a step back and confront yourself and what is actually going on. Fear has no place in the Christian heart. None. Especially with regards to decision-making. Fear and Love are contrary. If you can not live without fear, you will never find love. I'm not talking about rough times. Everyone has rough times. I am talking about daily decisions about your values and your morals and the choices you make in life.

That is all. ~Rosem

Safe Spaces, Boundaries, and Energy Exchange

 Humans have a powerful force inside them of potential. We can use that power for good, or for bad. We are susceptible to temptations that manipulate and blind us into falling into the darkness. That is why mental health, mindfulness, and self-reflection are so important. It's pretty amazing what humans can do. We can either decide to be good company to ourselves, or bad company. Neutral company is commonly bad company that we pretend isn't bad. The same can be said about who we share our time and energy with.

Sometimes in life, we cross paths with souls who feed us and make us feel at home. Sometimes, we cross paths with souls who take from us and hurt us; most-often inadvertently because they have wiggly boundaries with themselves. Often times, the souls we cross paths with are a confusing blend of the two, and it is important that we practice mindfulness and awareness of our instincts so that we can detangle those nests to protect our own energies, but also the relationships we have with others.

Boundaries are the fundamental tool we must use to protect ourselves, and others in life through true respect. Without boundaries, we ignore the intrinsic value of our spirits and the spirits of those we encounter. Boundaries are all about acknowledging our truths, and the truths of those around us, and respecting them. I do not believe people can learn to truly love or connect with themselves or others if they do not decide to confront the realities of boundaries or mindfulness.

The reason I share, is because I have been learning to recognize how boundaries carry significance, even in the smallest ways. In ways, that we would not think could matter. In our new world where many work from home, or have appointments at home, we open up our private residence, a place where it is important that we have feelings of safety and sanctuary, to the energies (in the form of words, actions, judgements or attitudes) of people we would never normally do this with. Eg; coworkers, doctors, counselors etc. Some of these people have bright, strong energies with their spirits like many counselors or some doctors might, but some; probably most of these people, have a nest of positive and negative "vibes" (if "energies" doesn't make sense to you), and these can easily infiltrate our safe spaces, or our own beings without us realizing.

There is a reason that before we leave the front door of our homes, all of us have a ritual of some sort. We have armor that we put on. Makeup, certain clothing, jewelry. Everyone has something of this sort most of the time. And it is for good reason. The simple action of making ourselves feel more presentable puts us into a mind-space where we are more able to withstand any negative energies we might encounter during our day. At home, however, we remove those layers and relax; as everyone needs to, so that we can recharge and explore all parts of our humanity, and not just the ones we are willing to share with the world.

These rituals have their merit, value, and purpose. It is unspoken but very real. I encourage taking time to recognize our feelings in different moments, and different locations. Often I find that insomnia overcomes me if I "work" in my bed, or expose myself to (the many possible) negative energies even just on my phone; Instagram, snapchat, etc. in what should be a safe, resting space like my bed. All of these things expose us to the world outside our sanctuary. There is a reason these things can be taxing or disorienting. With technology, we live in a very different world where mindfulness and boundaries are more important than ever.

It makes logical sense that more of us would be depressed if we are unknowingly letting negative energies and forces penetrate into our safe spaces; day to day, moment to moment.

Keeping positive relationships with ourselves and strong boundaries are essential to survival and healing. Now, and in the future.

Namaste Honor the Divine in You.

True, Pure, Infinite Love

Soulmates can be best friends. Best friends can be a different sex from your own. I can live with my best friends for my whole life if I want to. I can raise my own family with my chosen family (friends) and live together if I want to. I can love in many different ways. Infinite different ways, and be giving and sharing and passionate with many different people. I can chose to keep loved ones close. I can chose to have a community in an "alternative" lifestyle. My lifestyle. This is the beauty of freedom.

Humans are made to love in more ways that we often give ourselves a template for. I have been given the gift of experiencing this. My birth-given religious traditions make no room for this. It is real. I do believe in Christ and Jesus and the Holy Spirit. I know it to be true. But I also know many other beautiful things to be true. Our God is not contained within the confines of tradition or social construct. The way white people have chosen to constrict God through their methods of Christianity is opposing to the divine truth, and the all-encompassing love that Christ gives to those who seek Him. If we truly want to find Christ, we need to read the gospels on love, get over our tradition and pride, and take a long ass hike through the world; through the fields of discomfort, through the crowds of strangers and dare to challenge ourselves in what is difficult, to learn to hold life in it's purest form.

True, Pure, Infinite Love is ours for the taking. All we must do is allow ourselves to be open to it.

--- Upon rereading this, I know it is cryptic. I am talking about the church being anti-gay and anti-premarital sex. I have lived a life which has proven to me that honoring our sexuality is an essential part of forming love with ourselves and with others. My first real, true loving relationship was with a gay man. This relationship had whole, filling intimacy, with waxes and wanes of giving and receiving care and love. This man was the first person in my life to see me as I fully am, and to embrace and love me enthusiastically for it. In breaking up with him, I have had to relearn how to feel love, knowing that he gave me love in a bigger way than I even know yet how to give myself. When we were together, our love for each other was overpouring. I had extra love and energy to spare. But somewhere along the road, his grief and pain of his past and the way he views himself hardened him, and I was no longer granted access to the depths of his heart and mind. This lack of intimacy was the largest loss, but the shift of our relationship to become one of friendship has not been easy or comfortable. It is painful, and I have resolved that it may be painful for a very long time. But that is okay. Grief is a beautiful thing, and I am capable of moving forward and loving others and myself regardless of how I feel for him. He will always be there, and we still continue to love each other in our passing moments.

I have been blessed. I have experienced a taste of true love. Its overpouring, infinite nature. Grief of any size can not fill that. Nor need it. There is no way to express how truly and deeply it was, is; and at the same time how beautiful, true, right, loving and good it was for us to part ways as significant-others. I do not regret any single moment of the last few years with him, or the moments since we decided to part. All involved positive growth and love. Love is listening. Love is embracing. Love is forgiving. Love is empathizing. Love is being selfless, not because you think you should but because you genuinely, deeply want nothing more than to be.